Hunting for rainbows

I originally wrote this post way back in April, 2020, just as the pandemic was setting in. I had shared it with my coworkers at the time as part of a daily email chain. Now that the pandemic is taking another unpredictable twist, I wanted to share the article here, as I think it will resonate with many of you.

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One of the things I enjoy most about my solitary lunchtime walks are the rainbows. Fashioned from colored paper or bright markers, these crafty displays of hope hang in windows all around my neighborhood. I imagine many of you have seen the same as #RainbowHunts spread around the region.

Lately, I’ve also been on a different sort of rainbow hunt. I’ve been working on a project to profile LGBTQ+ Boy Scouts and alumni, and found myself talking recently to David Knapp. He’s a 94-year-old Boy Scout who waged a 20+ year battle to be accepted in the organization as an out gay man. Our first phone call turned into another and another, and if I had to guess, we’ve probably spent 4 or 5 hours on the phone together now. Each minute is an absolute delight. He’ll start off telling one fascinating story, stop to make sure he’s not taking up too much of my time, and then at my urging he’ll weave that story into another.

David has told me about discovering his sexuality at age 60, divorcing his wife and opening a new chapter in his life when most others his age were settling into a quiet retirement. He’s told me about marching in the NYC Pride parade for decades — in his Scout uniform — demanding gay rights. He’s told me about the years he spent organizing and agitating in his community to create changes he desperately wanted to see. He’s told me about how he’s managed not only to survive, but to thrive in the face of so many seemingly insurmountable obstacles.

In these times of dire uncertainty, there’s something extremely comforting about these conversations. David was a child of the Great Depression. Few people living today have experienced the incredible range of highs and lows that he has seen. It reminds me that we will endure this crisis, too. It also reminds how in some ways, quarantine is such a rare opportunity. It’s given me the time to indulge in these conversations with David and let them ramble on as they may. I’ve got nowhere to be, and neither does he. At his age, each day is a gift, and for me, each conversation is, too.

My time spent getting to know David has been an unexpected highlight of the last few weeks. We’re little more than two strangers strung together by circumstance and technology, yet he feels like an old friend. Maybe some time soon I’ll have the pleasure of meeting him.

I hope you all find some space in this time to connect with someone new. May I suggest someone of the grandfatherly variety — you might be surprised how much you enjoy it.