In the face of the 'Don't Say Gay' bill, please 'Say Gay'

It’s hard to put into words the pain, exhaustion and sadness I felt this week when I learned about the 'Don't Say Gay' bill, a piece of legislation in Florida that aims to keep discussion about sexuality and gender out of the classroom.

It hurts to be reminded that plenty of Americans still think the mere existence of LGBTQ+ people is “inappropriate.” It’s exhausting to see yet another homophobic law heaped onto the growing pile of transphobic legislation in this country. And it’s simply sad to think about the impact this could have on queer kids in Florida.

And so in the face of Florida’s 'Don't Say Gay' bill, I ask all of you: ‘Please Say Gay.’ That’s right. As I’ve written many times before, I believe Scouting has a unique opportunity to be the safe haven for queer kids that are closeted at home and demonized at school.

But that won’t happen with mere “tolerance.” The message that kids in Florida (and certainly elsewhere) are getting is: “Being gay is not okay.” What message are they getting from Scouting? For a long time, it was the same. Now? It might be something like: “Being gay is tolerable.” If they’re lucky, it could be: “Being gay is great.”

The legislation in Florida is a reminder that we must be just as explicit in our acceptance as they are in their rejection. So, “Please Say Gay.” Please say, “Gay is great, amazing, wonderful, beautiful, safe, whole.” Please say, “We love you not despite your identity, but because of your identity.” Please say, “You are welcome here and we’d love to have you.”

Don’t misunderstand me: I know just as well as anyone that Scouting is not a place for sexual education. That’s not what this is about. We as a society foist gender and sexuality upon children from the moment they are born (and often, well before that). We ask toddlers if they have a “little girlfriend.” We have no problem discussing sexual orientation or gender identity around children, as long as it’s heterosexual and cisgender.

So the bill in Florida is not actually about making sure classroom discussions are “age-appropriate,” it’s about stigmatizing LGBTQ+ kids and pretending they don’t exist. I would hate to see the same thing happen in Scouting. There is plenty of room within the parameters of Scouting to be explicitly and loudly affirming of the LGBTQ+ community in a way that is “age-appropriate.”

Just last week, I highlighted tons of resources for activities at all age ranges that can accomplish this. Last month, I spoke to merit badge counselors who are embracing the Citizenship in Society badge’s potential for LGBTQ+ inclusion. In October, I talked to an assistant scoutmaster from Massachusetts who revamped her troop’s website and social media presence to be explicitly inclusive of diversity.

This is what I’m talking about when I ask you to ‘Please Say Gay.’ I know on some level I’m preaching to the choir here. I’m sure most of you don’t need to be convinced. But I do think it’s important to remember that LGBTQ+ youth need more than tolerance. They need acceptance, affirmation and love. And Scouting, if we play our cards right, can give that to them.